Monday, March 13, 2017

Birthday Party Epiphany

So I hate kids birthday parties. That thing where the parents invite every kid in class to a party that costs an absurd amount of money? Yeah fuck that. I cannot stand it. I rarely send my kids. I never host. But every once in a while a kid who is actually a friend of one my kids will have such a party and we attend, because if there is one thing our cross-country move has taught me it's the value of true friendship. So when it's someone we care about or a friend from class that my kid talks about all the time I'll at least try to make the effort. Yesterday was one such instance. This party was for a 6YO who my daughter has gone to school with since daycare days, played sports with, etc. Plus her mom is cool so I can hang at the party with her. All good, right? Yeah sure.

The party was at the local roller skating rink, which is every bit as old school and run down as you'd expect. It was my and my daughters first time there so I didn't don any bitchin' skates and opted to just help her. After a few turns with a PVC pipe walker she was off and rolling without me. This particular party was full of moms, and even some dads, that I'm well acquainted with so I thought I'd have a nice time. What I didn't account for however is that for whatever reason, I still don't fit in with these people. I had some nice chats, caught up with a few people I haven't seen in a while, but my conversations were short and basic. I found myself standing alone, wishing I had even an ounce of interest in roller skating so I'd have something to do. Not only was on the fringes, I felt purposely pushed to the side. Even though I have 2 older kids, I'm still always the youngest mom out there. And older moms really hate the young mom. They don't want to talk to me, and quite frankly they don't want their kids to be friends with mine. I watched as my daughter struggled to be included, constantly trying to stay relevant and accepted. As it turns out my daughter and I are a lot more alike than I thought. I remember the days of trying hard to fit in, doing whatever it took to make people like me. I'm glad I don't care now, and standing there alone at the roller rink surrounded by stuck up moms 10 years older than me really made me realize just how much of a gift it is that they don't want to talk to me. I don't want to be back in high school, pretending to be someone I'm not, hoping to get invited to the next party, talking shit about the other women because I'm insecure and vapid. I realized in that moment that the relative silence was peaceful. Being able to watch my daughter make her way around the rink without me, and fall down and pick herself right back up, was way better than having mindless conversations with someone who couldn't care less about what I had to say. Yesterday I learned that I'm ok, and my daughter will be ok, even if we aren't surrounded by people dying to get to know us. Besides, few people can handle the amount of straight sass and badass-ery the two of us exude.

Friday, March 3, 2017

You Don't Have to Talk to Me

I'm big on supporting small local businesses. I almost always buy birthday presents at the toy store in town. I frequent the farmer's market as much as I can in the summer. But my favorite place is the local wine store with the farm to table restaurant in the back. The food is yummy, the selection is fantastic, and the owner's kids play baseball with mine. It's the perfect small town store. I ran in there today to fill up a growler with the best cider I've ever had (for real, if you've never had Blue Bee cider you are missing out. I'm actually just waiting til it's a decent hour to pour myself a glass), and grab some of my favorite wine that is also sold there. I decided to go ahead and get 6 bottles because a) there is a discount and b) my husband also loves it which is why I had to buy more in the 1st place. The place smelled amazing when I walked in so I decided to sit down and have a little lunch. I'm minding my own business, with my growler and wine on the table. This guy walks in, and from the second he gets through the door I can tell that he is looking at me through his sunglasses. I'm certain I don't know him, so I go back to eating my food. He says to me "wow, you're gonna drink all that by yourself?" I look at the growler and with my 'what the fuck" face on respond with "not right now?" He says "no the wine, that's an awful lot of wine". Me again, this time with an even more pronounced 'what the fuck' face "what? I'm bringing that home..." and then he stood there and stared at me and I went back to eating my lunch and playing on my phone. That was not the response he was looking for I guess so he said "well you don't have to be rude". Ha! Oh but I do! So, without even looking up at him I said "you also don't have to talk to me". And then I enjoyed the rest of my lunch as he stammered off. When he passed back by me a few minutes later he had purchased AN ENTIRE CASE OF WINE. Probably to drink all by himself in one sitting. Dick. 

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Gluten is Stupid









One year ago today I was diagnosed with Celiac disease (thank you Facebook for the fun memories). I thought by now I'd be an old pro, but honestly, being gluten-free fucking sucks. And I'm really bad at it. I've found some decent alternatives. I used a neighbors really awesome pizza recipe and was able to adapt it to be GF. It's better than the frozen options out there, and doesn't cost an absurd amount to make. GF pretzels are even better than the originals (Snyder's of Hanover makes buffalo style GF pretzels and they are delicious!), but sometimes you just can't replace the real thing. GF beer is awful. Like truly terrible. The gluten removed ones are ok, but I can't drink too many of them because they still contain traces of gluten. In reality, when I'm in the mood for a good beer I just drink one and deal with the consequences later. Kind of like how it's worth it to eat a real hotdog bun. Yum.

I thought for sure that I would just start dropping weight too. I mean, people go gluten-free as a diet right? So I should be skinny now, right? Uh, wrong. I've only gained weight, which just makes me want to eat more bread. And drink more beer. But I feel better, and I'm learning how to make all my go-to recipes GF. The whole family is eating healthier and I can't rely on just grabbing KFC for any meal, which also doesn't hurt the wallet. I'm also meal planning now which makes our crazy hectic schedule so much easier. We have sports/rehearsals/events at least 3 nights a week but we still get to have a real dinner together, and meal planning helps me not spend 3x more than necessary on groceries that will eventually go bad. So now that I've gotten my shit a little bit together I think I've learned my lesson and should be free of this gluten-free nightmare. What if I say please?


Thursday, February 2, 2017

ACV to the Rescue!

Have ya'll ever used apple cider vinegar for health things? When I was a kid I had several moles removed from my neck. Now, some 25 years later, I've got little skin tag like things popping up on my neck again. Yesterday one of them got caught on my coat, which was really great, so today I decided I'd try a little ACV and see if it actually works. I poured some onto a piece of tissue, put in on the spot, and covered it with a couple bandaids. Then I forgot about it and went to work (in a public place) and to the bus stop. It's weird, and super gross, and I smell like apple cider vinegar. But damnit I want this thing gone! So I'll keep this up for a few days and see if works. If it does I'm using it on every weird skin thing I find. If not, then I'll have made myself look like a weirdo to more people than I care to admit. #thankspinterest #ACV #weirdhomeopathy

Monday, January 30, 2017

Back At It

So I've been out of the blogosphere for a while now, due to a lot of factors. Mostly I'm a lazy bum, but I've also been really busy with 3 kids and sports and work and volunteering and choir that I haven't had the time to even think of a good topic. Turns out being busy also makes me painfully boring. Then I accidentally deleted the wifi driver from our old laptop so the only way to get onto the internet to write was to hide in the closet under the stairs where the only ethernet cable is, or use my phone which made me stabby. But alas! I finally have a fully functioning computer in a sunny spot NOT under the stairs, and I'm itching to start blogging again. I let my oldest read an old post about him and he laughed and laughed, and I remembered why I started this whole blog thing in the first place. Then he made me a cup of coffee and I remembered why having kids was such a smart idea on my part. Shortly after finishing that sentence my boys starting screaming at each other about why the other one sucks, and once again I find myself question the decision to have multiple children. So I'm drinking my coffee and pretending I'm alone in a coffee shop somewhere where children aren't allowed. 

Sunday, September 18, 2016

Who Am I and What Am I Doing Here

8 years ago I started a blog. The Rational Mind of a Crazy Woman was my baby. It gave me an outlet and place to work out my thoughts, but more importantly it reignited my love of writing. I haven’t posted anything there in a really long time, and since I started that blog my life has changed significantly. What hasn’t changed is my desire to write and share my thoughts and air my grievances, so I’m starting this new blog. This blog represents a little more of who I am now, but I am still that Crazy Woman too so for the time being I’ll be keeping that blog active as well. If you’re interested in what crazy ramblings I had back then please check it out at http://rationalmindofacrazywoman.blogspot.com If you are going to stick around and read my posts, you should know that some things have not and will not change. I still curse like a sailor. I say what I want. If you have a problem with that or you get offended too easily, kindly remove the stick from your ass and find a new blog to read. Cheers!

Tuesday, December 8, 2015

Time Marches On

So Facebook shows you memories now of what you've done on this date in past years; I'm sure you've seen them. Today it showed me that 5 years ago I announced to the world (well, Facebook world anyway) that I was expecting baby number 3. I was struck with a multitude of emotions; nostalgia, happiness, sadness, and even loss. What I realized is that it's been 5 years since I saw 2 little pink lines, 5 years since the last time I would ever see those lines. Most days I'm happy that we are done having children. 3 is a lot to handle. Our family feels complete and all of my kids sleep through the night. But sometimes, on days like today, I'm sad that I'll never do it again. No pink lines, no morning sickness, no anticipation. No midnight wake up calls or poopie diapers or spit up covered clothes. No more breastfeeding and 1st steps and hearing "mama" for the first time. No, my kids aren't babies anymore. Big kids are amazing too and I love who mine are becoming, and most days I'm happy that I don't have to dress them or feed them. I get to have real conversations with them and they help me do their laundry. But for tonight I'm going to look at old pictures on Facebook and definitely not cry.